Not Recommended. A gazillion dollar extravagant waste of two and a half hours. Yeah! It’s finally over! Sorry, Star Wars fans, I only like the original two, Episodes 4 and 5. But there were a few cool things in this one. The Special effects were great, but empty and ultimately boring because the drama was so uninspiring. Also, very cool how Lucas was able to weave together a story that would ultimately set up for A New Hope and Empire, and explain the background for them. Ridiculous lines: After a crash landing, Obi Wan says, “Another happy landing.” Overall cool concept of the analogy with Hitler’s Germany, the story replicates how Hitler, seized power to make Germany his empire while being a Chancellor with emergency powers. Order 66: the execution of all the Emperor’s enemies and Jedis was a reflection of the Night of the Long Knives in 1934 when Hitler killed his questionable enemies in the SA and elsewhere. Okay, I liked that analogy. Battles: Boring. Especially when they are fighting droids, who are merely little machines. There is no seriousness to destroying machines, no human element to make it scary. Unforgivable inconsistent philosophy: Obi Wan tells Anakin to go ahead and deal with the senate because, “I’m not brave enough for politics. I have to report to the counsel (of Jedi).” And what, may I ask, is a counsel of Jedis, BUT A FREAKIN’ POLITICAL BODY that is just as political as the Senate?! And all in the same sentence is this contradiction. Unforgivable, it is. When the “turned” Anakin says to Obi Wan, in an obvious reference to Jesus, “you are either for me or against me,” Obi says, “Only a Sith deals in absolutes.” But then a few minutes later, Obi tells Anakin the “Chancellor is evil.” Oh? Well, Mr. supposed-to-be-wise-man, if there are no absolutes, then how can you call the Chancellor evil? Are you a Sith now? Actually, Anakin responds with a good line that reveals the dark side as Relativistic: “From my point of view, the Jedi are evil.” I think this is great. The evil side are postmoderns and relativistic. The bad guy even says the Jedi are “narrow minded and dogmatic, we must study all sides of the force to understand the bigger picture.” Yeah! All you relativists and pomos out there are victims of the dark side. Na na na na! But then Lucas contradicts himself because to be dogmatic, as he says the Jedi are, is to be absolutistic, which is what Obi said the Sith were. Sheesh! Stop the pain! But the contradictions don’t stop. More Buddhist B.S. occurs when Anakin is told by a Jedi that “Fear of loss is a path to the dark side. Attachment leads to jealousy, Let go of everything you fear to lose.” This Eastern style philosophy of detachment is what makes the East so cruel and heartless to pain and suffering. They fight against compassion, you know the kind of thing that Jesus said we should have with the suffering. But instead this “detachment” makes Eastern culture into a barbaric cruelty to those who suffer, by ignoring them, and avoiding the attachment that love brings to the object of affection. This is why Eastern monks are so heartless and uncompassionate. They cannot make true human connection because that would be attachment. This is definitely the philosophy of Hollywood celebrity. The Eastern worldview is soulless and cruel. Here is a great ridiculous line that telegraphs the poor philosophy that this whole mythology is about. When Obi can’t find someone he is looking for, Yoda tells him, “Use your feelings, and find him, you will.” Well, obviously the line should be “use the Force.” So we see that the Force really is just a metaphor for your feelings. Once again, follow your heart, not an absolute objective truth. Let your feelings rule you. Well, I’ve got to stop. I’ve already given this blog way too much time on this unworthy movie.
